Fallen
by Serenade of Shadows
Summary: Love. Friendship. Pain. Everything is there, but is it enough to keep everyone alive and well? Too many things happen in this world, and we all know that they must stop. AN: I'm sorry that this got cut short. Maybe I'll put the rest in a sequel...
1. Going Under

Inspired by Evanescence's album of the same title, Fallen is probably one of the most important fics I will ever write. Each chapter will include a message of love, fear, or some other strong emotion. Each chapter will include the lyrics of the song of the same title at the end for those of you who have never heard the song before.

* * *

Going Under

Sam sat in her desk staring at the clock, watching, waiting for the instant school would be released for the weekend. Much contrasting to the other students in her class, she dreaded this final moment of the school week. To Sam, this meant going home, and going home meant seeing her father, the sole reason for her frightful, antagonistic view of the world.

He was a hateful man, always finding some way to hurt Sam or make her cry. Forever scarred by his drunken rages, unintelligible vocal harassment and, mostly, uncontrollable physical abuse, Sam always hid herself under sweatshirts and jeans. Her fear lived deep inside of her, and followed her around in the shadows everywhere she went. Her life had been getting so horrible lately; she no longer had any amount of trust for anyone, not even herself, other than her best friends, Carly and Freddie.

Of course, Sam had never shared her fear or mistreatment with anyone, even Carly or Freddie, and she had no intention to do so. There was no reason to get the police or any other services involved in her problem. Plus, she would much rather have people fearing _her_ for once, which was why she always took advantage of people's weaknesses to overpower them in some shape or form.

All at once, the malignant bell rang, signaling the beginning of two atrocious days in hell. Sam slowly rose from her desk, attempting to enjoy her last few minutes of freedom before walking to the worst possible place in the world. She glanced around the classroom and noticed Freddie and Carly waiting for her at the doorway.

"Come on, Sam!" Carly said, rushing over to the girl and pushing her to the door. "We're going to Groovy Smoothies, and you have to come with us!"

Sam just looked at the floor and back up to the smiling faces of the two best friends any girl could ever wish for. "I can't," she said quietly, wishing that Carly had never invited her to go along.

Freddie tilted his head slightly, seeming confused by Sam's rejection. "Why not?" he asked, taking Sam's hand. "You never turn down an offer to do something with us. Is there something wrong?"

"No, Freddie, there's nothing wrong," Sam said, attempting to smile and put it all off as unimportant. "I've just got some things to do tonight, that's all. And my dad wants them all done right away, so maybe I can do something with you guys tomorrow or Sunday."

Freddie shrugged. "Whatever you say, Sam," he said dismissively. "I guess I'll just have to go with Carly, then. Maybe Spencer will come with us to make it feel more homey."

Sam smiled softly at Freddie's 'homey' comment and said, "I really have to get going. I'll see the two of you later."

"You sure you don't want us to walk you home or something, Sam?" Carly asked. "Because we have all weekend to do whatever we want, but we still don't get to see a lot of you outside of school. Maybe we could come over and help you finish some of those things your dad wants you to do!"

"No!" Sam yelled, instantly regretting it for the pained looks on her friends' faces. "I'm sorry, guys. My dad really wants me to do this by myself. I'll see you guys later." With that, she walked slowly away from the only two in the world that could save her.

"SAMANTHA!" The hateful voice of her father rang throughout the entire house as soon as she stepped in the door. "You never do anything around here, worthless bitch!"

_"The swine must be sitting on the couch with his precious whiskey bottle," _Sam thought in disgust. "I'm not cleaning up your mess, you can forget it," she shouted to the repulsive man.

Out of nowhere, a figure appeared in the darkened entrance to the living room. "What did you just say to me?" asked the drunken voice of Sam's father. Sam had given him no reaction, causing him to shove her against the wall and repeat himself. "What did you say to me, you useless piece of filth?!"

Sam swallowed, terror taking over her entire body. But she knew she had to remain strong, or else she probably wouldn't make it past tonight. "I said, I'm not cleaning up your stupid mess, so you can forget about it," she said firmly, yet fearfully. She stared back into the glazed, glaring eyes of her father for hope she would be able to predict what might happen next. When he did nothing but growl and shove her harder into the wall, Sam spoke up once more.

"I do everything around here! You're the worthless one! I do all the chores and more. You have no idea! I cry every night. I scream, wishing you away. I _lie_ for you, deceive my own friends for the sake of keeping your stupid alcohol abuse secret! And not to mention all the blood that has been spilt in this house. And you know that not a drop of that blood has been yours. But you don't care, because my dad can't hear me. He can _never_ hear me! I'm sure he's too intoxicated to even remember that today is the third anniversary of the day Mom died!"

The grip of the man on Sam loosened slightly, but she found out it was not to let her down; he had thrown her to the floor, most likely just to watch her suffer. "You bring up that day again, and you'll wish you'd never been born," the wicked man growled, throwing his empty bottle on the floor next to Sam's head. A few shards of glass escaped and cut her face.

"Too late," she muttered, rising from the floor, trace amounts of blood falling from her face. "I've wished I'd never been born since…that day… And maybe, just _maybe_, if that were the case, I'd finally wake up from this nightmare. Not tormented by you everyday, not at the bottom, like I am right now. You know what? I probably _am _dying here. I'm sure you'll be glad to see me gone."

The wicked eyes of the man became hard as he rushed toward Sam and pinned her against the wall one more time. "You little brat! I feed you, house you, and put the clothes on your back! Now you think you can talk to me like this? You know what I think? I think I'm just going to–"

"Going to what?" came the cool voice of a police officer as he threw open the door and stepped in, followed closely by Freddie and Carly, all three with hateful and worried looks on their faces. "You're not going to do anything to that girl, Jonathan Puckett, other than put her down."

"Officer, I can explain," Jonathan said, releasing Sam. "You see–"

"Nothing you can possibly say can save you now, Puckett," the officer said, roughly taking the man's hands and cuffing them behind his back. "You are under arrest for the physical and mental abuse of a sixteen-year-old girl among other charges. Anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law…"

"Just get him away from me," Sam said quietly, tears of hate and fear falling from her eyes as she pressed herself into the wall to get as far away from the man that called himself her father as possible. "I never want to see his disgusting face again…"

The officer nodded and began pushing Jonathan out the door. "I'd like for you to come see me at the station later so we can go over some things, Sam. You can bring Freddie and Carly if you want." He paused for a moment. "You're lucky to have such good friends." He left the house, shoved Puckett into the back of his car, and drove off.

"Sam!" Freddie cried, rushing over to take the girl into his arms. "Are you ok? Your face is all cut up! Oh, Sam, what did he do to you?"

Sam put a finger to Freddie's lips and hugged him close. "I'm fine, Freddie, it's just a few scratches. What I want to know is how you guys knew to call the police."

"We followed you home," Carly said, nonchalantly leaning against the door. "We knew it was a bad thing to do, but we probably ended up saving your life."

"Thanks, guys," Sam said, more tears falling as she continued to lean into Freddie. "There's just one problem; now I have no adult to live with."

Carly smiled and waved her hand in Sam's direction. "Already have it taken care of. Spencer said you could live with us, and if they don't let you, we'll take it to court."

"You're all too good to me," Sam whispered, love and appreciation for her friends taking over the anger and hate she felt toward her father. "But my stupid father…he can just go on and scream, because I'll be so far away from him forever."

"You won't be broken again," Freddie said before kissing Sam's forehead. "You'll never be lost under the shadow of your father's hate anymore."

"Not as long as we're around!" Carly added, opening the door so that they could all get out of the cursed house.

"Why don't we go get those smoothies now to celebrate my freedom?" Sam asked, pulling Freddie toward the door.

"Yeah, let's go!" Carly and Freddie said in unison. And with that, the three best friends walked out the door and into a new life.

* * *

There you have it. Sam's alive because Carly and Freddie happened to follow her home that fateful Friday night after school. Without them, it is quite possible that Sam could have eventually been killed. Now that's what I call good friends. I'd like to know what you guys thought of this, so please review.

Evanescence - Going Under

Now I will tell you what I've done for you

Fifty thousand tears I've cried

Screaming deceiving and bleeding for you

And you still won't hear me

Don't want your hand this time I'll save myself

Maybe I'll wake up for once

Not tormented daily defeated by you

Just when I thought I'd reached the bottom

I'm dying again

I'm going under

Drowning in you

I'm falling forever

I've got to break through

I'm going under

Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies

So I don't know what's real and what's not

Always confusing the thoughts in my head

So I can't trust myself anymore

I'm dying again

I'm going under

Drowning in you

I'm falling forever

I've got to break through

I'm going under

So go on and scream

Scream at me I'm so far away

I won't be broken again

I've got to breathe I can't keep going under


	2. Bring Me to Life

This time, something is going on in Sam's mind, and she doesn't know what it is. Will Freddie be able to help her figure out what's going on?

* * *

Bring Me to Life

_How is it that Freddie seems to be able to see all? He looks into my eyes, and sees right through them as if they are open doors… he is unknowingly able to dive into the deepest depths of my soul, the very core of my existence. But I wonder whether he knows how horribly my soul aches, how numb I feel as my spirit is left alone to die in the darkness. I am soulless, cold, alone, until he truly finds me…and leads me back home._

"Sam." I could hear Freddie call my name as I lay, the hollow dreams of darkness beginning to shatter. "Open your eyes, Sam," he said softly, kissing my cheek as he lifted me from the floor.

I looked around, confused by my reluctant sleep. "What am I doing in your apartment?" I asked him dazedly, allowing my gaze to wander around the dwelling and focus on the various objects scattered about the place. "Better question. Why was I _sleeping_ in your apartment?"

Freddie held me close to his body, appearing as though he were afraid that I might drift off into nonexistence at any moment. "You fell asleep last night when we were watching that movie," he said as he brushed a stray hair away from my face. "I had Carly call your mom and tell her that you were spending the night over there." He fell silent for a moment, but quickly continued. "I'm sorry I woke you up. It seemed like you were having a horrible nightmare, and I wanted you to know that you'll be ok as long as I'm here."

I buried my face into his chest, thankful for having someone as compassionate as Freddie in my life to take care of me. "No, don't be sorry," I whispered, turning my head so that I could look into his gentle, insightful eyes. Those eyes were unavoidable, truth seeking, and they always found the weaker, helpless side of me.

"Do you have something you need to tell me?" questioned the ever-perceptive Freddie, just as I had expected. Before he allowed me to answer, he laid me down on his couch, seating himself next to my head as soon as the task had been finished. "You look worried about something."

I sighed; I was frightened by the fact that Freddie would probably not believe me, especially not now, right after waking up from what he called a horrible nightmare. "You'll believe me?" I asked, almost positive that he wouldn't. "Even if it does sound like a bad lie?"

Freddie raised his eyebrow and pulled me up so that I was sitting next to him. "Now why would I not believe you?" he inquired, slightly squeezing my shoulder. "You're begging me to accept what you're about to tell me as the truth. I have no choice here, Sam. I'm going to have to believe you; I trust you."

I smiled, leaning my head against Freddie's shoulder. "Thank you for being so understanding," I said calmly. "But you still might think I'm crazy after I tell you about this."

Freddie frowned and shook his head, apparently thinking I was insane for going on about nothing. "Why don't you just tell me what it is on your mind? It can't be that bad." His frown was wiped away by a loving smile as he said, "I promise I won't think you're crazy, Sam. And even if you were, I'd still be here for you."

I drew in a breath to calm my mind before speaking. It took a few tries for the words to come; I'd never spoken about anything like this with anyone before. And now, sitting here with Freddie, it was even harder to explain how I was feeling. After a minute or two of thinking and Freddie's sweet patience, I was able to speak. "I…I don't know if I'm truly alive Freddie." He raised his eyebrow, but listened intently as I continued. "I feel like I'm nothing more than some endless void, an embodiment of nothingness. The feeling is not in emotions, but deep in my soul, which I feel that I no longer have. I feel like…no one can save me. No one but you."

Freddie gazed at me for the longest time without speaking, though the look on his face was not one of confusion or rejection. At length, he spoke. "So basically, you feel like you're coming undone, falling apart. You need somebody to save you, and you think that person is me?"

I nodded gratefully; I knew that his belief was sincere, and he truly wanted to help me. "But now that you know, you won't just leave me…will you?" I asked, for although there was relief for Freddie's believing me, there was also fear that he was only acting and wanted to take me to a psychiatrist somewhere.

"No, Sam," Freddie said, his penetrating eyes finding their way to my heart once more. "I'm going to help make you real. I _will _bring you to life."

"Thank you so much, Freddie!" I exclaimed, throwing myself at him in a satisfying embrace. My attention suddenly turned back to what we were discussing. "You have no idea how lost, how frozen I'd be without you, Freddie Benson. You are so much more than what you believe."

Freddie chuckled, probably embarrassed by my praise. "Well, I guess you could call me the life among the dead," he said softly, stroking my hair. "Shall we help you find yourself now, or are we going to wait another sixteen years?"

"Now would be wonderful," I said quickly, wishing to become complete once again. "But where do we start?"

"There is nowhere to go, Sam," Freddie said, and I believed him. He was the smart one, and I never doubted a single word he said. "To find your soul, we need to look inside here." He gently placed a finger over my heart, allowing it to rest there for only a moment. "I promise you that is all we need to do. Just lie down and close your eyes. The rest should come on it's own if you are able to search your heart."

"If that's what you say," I said softly, trusting everything Freddie had to say with my life. I lay back down and allowed my eyes to close. As the darkness slowly enveloped me, I could feel my subconscious mind begin to take over inside of me.

"I'm right here if you need me, Sam," I could hear the distant Freddie whisper beside my unmoving body. "Be strong." I felt his lips touch my cheek, but just barely. I was much too focused in the regeneration of my soul.

Searching the darkness for the essence of my existence was not as difficult as it had at first seemed, for as soon as I let go of Freddie and the outside world, I could finally see. All that time, I had been kept in the dark, and yet all the answers were right there in front of me. It seemed as if I had been sleeping a thousand years, and just now I had had my eyes opened to everything. Without a thought, without a soul, I stood there, voiceless, knowing I wasn't going to die here, and that life was offering me something much more. That something…was Freddie.

I opened my eyes, and I was complete. I knew that with Freddie there beside me, even if something had gone wrong, I would have made it through, and we would be together forever. "Thank you so much, Freddie," I whispered, entirely blissful for the first time in what seemed like an eternity. "Thank you for everything." I wrapped my arms around his neck and leaned against his shoulder as he sat on the floor, gazing at me in wonder.

"Anything for you, Sam," he said, sweetly smiling up at me. "No matter what had happened, there would be no way to stop me from bringing you to life."

_And somehow, I knew he was right. There was no way for Freddie to possibly leave me behind, no matter how hard he tried. Now I am here, thankful for my eyes like open doors, and for the gift God has given to my own world, Freddie Benson, my savior. _

* * *

I'm sorry if the "Sam losing her soul" part had some of you lost. Basically, she was hollow inside and she didn't know why. Freddie helped to teach her to love again, and that just proves, once again, the bonds that love will form.

Evanescence - Bring Me to Life

How can you see into my eyes like open doors

Leading you down into my core

Where I've become so numb without a soul

My spirit sleeping somewhere cold

Until you find it there and lead it back home

Wake me up inside

Wake me up inside

Call my name and save me from the dark

Bid my blood to run before I come undone

Save me from the nothing I've become

Now that I know what I'm without

You can't just leave me

Breathe into me and make me real

Bring me to life

Wake me up inside

Wake me up inside

Call my name and save me from the dark

Bid my blood to run before I come undone

Save me from the nothing I've become

Frozen inside without your touch without your love

Darling only you are the life among the dead

All this time I can't believe I couldn't see

Kept in the dark but you were there in front of me

I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems

Got to open my eyes to everything

Without a thought without a voice without a soul

Don't let me die here there must be something more

Bring me to life

* * *


	3. Everybody's Fool

The beginning of this one may look like a Creddie, but it actually turns out to be Seddie, so bear with me.

* * *

Everybody's Fool

_Beautiful. Sweet. Intelligent. _Perfect._ Carly Shay had everyone believing she was perfect, even me. It seemed like it was all the time that I wanted her, no, needed her by my side. She was flawless, unreal. It was as if her very nature was perfect, almost self-indulged, actually, though everything about her was calling my name. But I know the truth now. The Carly that I knew was nothing more than a lie pitched to me for her own personal gain, and I'll never fall for her horrible greedy lies again. _

"Freddie!" She called my name, triggering my instinct to move, to follow the voice of the girl I thought of as my own. I allowed my legs to carry me to the door of my apartment, which I opened to reveal the glorious face of my sweet Carly.

"What's up?" I asked, giving her a quizzical look. "Is there something wrong? You weren't supposed to meet me here for another couple of hours."

Carly smiled, placing her hand on my shoulder. "No, Freddie," she said in her angelic voice. "Nothing's wrong. I just came to tell you something."

"Tell me what?" I questioned, relaxing a bit as I pulled her into my home and sat on the couch, inviting Carly to take her place next to me. I handed her my unopened bottle of water from the end table next to the couch and said, "It's not my mom, is it? She's not driving you away or something, because if she is, I could just–"

"Freddie, relax," Carly said, cutting me off. "It doesn't have anything to do with your mom. Actually, it's just kind of something to do with my plans…" She took a drink of the water I had handed her before continuing. "I can't go to see that movie with you tonight. Spencer had other plans, and I didn't know about them until today. I'm so sorry, Freddie."

I stared at her, thankful that I had the ability to successfully hide horror and disappointment from my face. "It's cool," I said casually, as if what I had just said were true. "I'll just take Sam instead or something. I need to put aside my differences with her and become friends someday, huh?"

"Yeah, you probably should," was Carly's reply. She kissed my nose and smiled sweetly at me. "I'm glad you understand, though," she said gently. "Dating you was definitely one of my better decisions." She glanced at the clock. "Well, I have to go. Spencer and I are leaving in about an hour, and I need to get ready."

I raised myself from the couch, pulling her up with me. "Alright then." I kissed her half-heartedly before saying good-bye and sending her out the door.

* * *

"Okay, dork, why are you calling me?" Ah, Sam. She always did have a way with words. I knew she didn't hate me, though. We had a pretty decent friendship going on. Now that I was dating Carly, she was going a little easier on me, and we actually did become very good friends.

"I wanted to see if you wanted to go to a movie with me tonight," I said, just imagining what her face must have looked like. I knew Sam had a huge crush on me, and to tell you the truth, I didn't really care. It was better than being hated by her by far. "And after that I'd probably take you to dinner. You know, just as friends."

"I'd love to go, Freddie," Sam said softly, probably counting all her accounts of good luck in the last five minutes. "But what about Carly? I thought you were taking her out tonight?"

"Not anymore," I said, not bothering to hide my disappointment with Sam. "She said that Spencer had plans for tonight and he didn't tell her until earlier today, so it looks like my plans with her have been ruined." I took a slightly quivering breath before asking Sam the question that had been on my mind. "Hey, Sam?"

"Yeah, what is it, Freddie?"

"Carly and I seem to be drifting apart lately. It has been two years since we started dating, and we're sixteen now, so things are really starting to change." I sighed, not wanting to ask, but knowing that I had to. "Do you think her love for me is fading, that I'm just not good enough for her anymore, or is it my mom that's pushing her away? Because I feel like Carly doesn't really care anymore, and maybe she's just making up excuses to stay away from me."

"I don't think Carly would do that to you," Sam said gently. "But I don't know for sure. You're my best friend, though, and I'll see what I can do to prove or disprove your theory. When are you coming to pick me up?"

"Five," I told her, slightly confused. "Why?"

"I just needed to know if I had enough time to put my plan into action, and three hours is definitely long enough, with time to spare to get ready."

"Alright. And you'll tell me everything you find out over dinner?" I questioned, wondering what her plan could be and how it would possibly work.

"Sounds like a deal, Freddie," Sam said, laughing a bit. "I'll see you in a few hours, most likely with all the information you'll need."

"Ok, bye then. And thanks."

"No problem." With that said, she hung up, leaving me with three painful hours of wondering exactly how my life was about to change.

* * *

Five o'clock came sooner than I had expected, and I was soon on my way to Sam's house in the new car I had actually persuaded my mom to buy me for my sixteenth birthday with my Evanescence CD playing on nearly max volume. I had no idea how I had recently gotten into the band, but their music seemed to relax me no matter what the negative emotion I'd be feeling at the time would happen to be. At the moment, that emotion happened to be anxiety, yet at the same time, I was feeling strangely excited to be taking Sam out. But I didn't really feel like thinking, so I lost myself in the music until I finally arrived at Sam's place.

When I pulled into Sam's driveway, I was surprised to see her waiting outside with a look of sheer horror on her face. I jumped out of my car and ran over to her. "What is it? You look horrified by something, and I need to know what's going on!"

"I think we're going to need to skip the movie tonight, Freddie," Sam said very quietly, wrapping her arms around my neck. "There's just too much to tell you, so very much that Carly has been keeping from you, and me, these whole two years that you've been together."

"Maybe we should do dinner another night, too…" I said, my voice equally soft. "How about we just go inside and you tell me what you did to get Carly to tell you everything."

"That will work," Sam murmured, taking my hand to guide me into her house. "No one's home right now, so we can talk in any room you'd like."

"If you wouldn't mind, I'd like to keep this in the family room," I said, keeping it to a request rather than a command. "I just don't really feel comfortable talking about Carly anywhere else in your house. I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry," Sam said sweetly as she sat down. "Carly is the one that's going to be sorry."

"Tell me everything."

* * *

"You created a new MSN account, added Carly, posed as some guy from school and said to her, 'So who are you really going out with? I've heard rumors of both Freddie and Jake,' and she said that she was going out with both of us, but she loved Jake more?" My confusion and anger had risen greatly from the point it was at before Sam told me everything, and I was close to my breaking point. "And then you asked her what her plans for tonight were, and she said she was going out with Jake. She's betrayed me…"

"Yeah, that's the way it was. I'm so sorry it had to be this way, Freddie," Sam said, tears in her eyes, most likely from my anger, even though I had not once lashed out on her. "I had no idea Carly was doing this, because you know if I did, you would have known before now."

"No, don't be sorry," I murmured, taking Sam into my arms. "I find it impossible to love her anymore, anyway. Why would I love somebody who was going out with another guy behind my back?" I gazed into her sensitive blue eyes for what seemed like an eternity before saying, "Besides, I think there might be someone else that cares about me too much to let me find another bad girlfriend. In fact, I think I might know someone who would be willing to be faithful."

Sam's gaze shifted from mine to the ground. "Oh, I hope you two get along well."

I chuckled at her misunderstanding. "No, Sam," I laughed. "You're that girl. I know that you care about me more than anything else, and I think that I have always felt the same way. Maybe the only reason I ever liked Carly…was because I actually liked you so much." I kissed her forehead, causing her to fling her arms around me and lean into my chest.

"I really do care about you, Freddie," Sam said, her tears soaking through my shirt. "And I wouldn't want anything like Carly to happen to you ever again." Her eyes turned to stone as she looked up at me. "You need to break it off with Carly yourself, though. And in person. It's more powerful that way. Then, maybe she'll see what she's doing to people."

"I know," I agreed. "I'll make sure to do that later. Wait… Did she by chance tell you where she and Jake would be going tonight?"

"Yeah, wh– Freddie, you have such a devious brain," Sam said, smirking at the idea she could tell was forming in my mind. "I can't wait to see how this works out."

* * *

The restaurant was exceedingly crowded by the time Sam and I arrived, which only worked more to the benefit of the plan that Sam claimed to be one of the most devious things I've ever come up with in my life so far. "This is perfect," I said to Sam, grinning in a dark way that I didn't even think was possible for someone like me. "And how did you manage to find such a striking dress? I didn't think you owned anything that dressy."

"My mom made me wear it to homecoming last year, remember? You commented on its beauty then, too." She grinned widely at what she too as a compliment and began walking to an open table, taking my hand as she went.

The table Sam had chosen, though there weren't really that many to choose from to begin with, happened to be one with a good view of Carly and Jake's table, though they were blind of us. We took our seats and waited for someone to come take our order. Despite the numerous other guests in the restaurant, a waiter (Gibby?!) immediately came to our service, and after we ordered our drinks and had a short discussion with Gibby about when, why, and how he got his waiting job, we began speaking again.

"I can't believe she's doing this to me," I breathed, only refraining from slamming my fist against the table as to not draw unwanted attention to myself. "It's even harder to see this after all I've been through with her, and everything I've done for her. And Jake. I'm sure he doesn't know about this, either."

Sam reached across the table and grabbed my hand. "You don't need to worry about it anymore, Freddie. You've got this plan, and you've got me. Besides, you've unmasked Carly and found out who she really is. Now, she has nowhere to hide."

I gave a short, humorless laugh. "Why would she need to hide? I think she's so lost in this lie she's got going on, she can't even find herself." My opinion had been stated, and it was at that moment that I realized I was not only out for revenge against Carly, but she truly needed help. "Maybe if our plan succeeds, she'll be able to see what she's doing after awhile. It's a long shot, but it just might work."

Sam nodded and opened her mouth to speak, but at that moment, Gibby returned with our drinks. He quickly took our orders, made a bit of small talk, and left us alone once again. "How did we manage to get Gibby as a waiter?" Sam asked, glancing over at the boy as he stopped by another table and began talking to the people sitting there.

"Guess that's just our luck," I replied, looking once again at Carly and Jake, who seemed to be having more fun together than Carly and I had ever had in a single date. "But I think I should get this over with before they leave. They look like they're almost done with their dinners." I raised myself out of my chair and took a long glance into Sam's beautiful eyes. "I'll be back in a few minutes," I said softly. "You can watch from over the ledge, here."

I steadily made my way to the table that seated Carly and Jake, thankful that their table was in the direction of the bathroom, for it would probably be needed in my false explanation for noticing them. I saw many people from school around the place, and wondered why this seemed to be the only place people ever came for dinner. Thankfully, though, none of them seemed to be paying any attention to me.

Shortly after, I approached the dreaded table and smiled at Carly and Jake. "Hey guys," I said, nonchalantly, waiting for a reaction from Carly. "I was just heading toward the restroom and I noticed you guys sitting over here, so I thought I'd stop by and talk for a few minutes. Is that ok?"

"No problem at all," Jake replied, motioning for me to take the empty chair next to him. "What brings you here tonight, Freddie?" he asked as Carly looked at me nervously.

"Oh, just out with Sam. Need to get together with friends sometimes, I suppose," I said, darkly eyeing Carly. "You and Carly must be here as friends, right? Because she was supposed to come here with me tonight."

Carly looked at me with a look of horror on her face. "What are you talking about?" she asked, her voice quavering far too much for it to be an honest question.

"Save it, Carly. I know the truth now." I gazed into her eyes, successfully breaking down her will to hide this from Jake. "I know who you are, Carly Shay, and I don't love you anymore."

"Freddie, what's going on?" Jake asked, a look of nervous confusion on his face.

"That's not the question, Jake," Carly said, her voice almost inaudible. "How did you find out, Freddie? How did you know that I was going out with Jake?"

I motioned for Sam to stand, which caused Carly and Jake to look over in her direction. She shot Carly a dark glare and sat back down. "She's been helping me," I told Carly. "You said you had unknown plans with Spencer tonight, but I know that he wouldn't just pop something on anyone like that. So I had Sam look into it."

"That's who the person I was talking to on MSN today was…" Carly said in realization. "You tricked me!"

Jake slowly shook his head. "Carly, I think you're the one who tricked all of us," he said, disappointment clearly showing on his face. "And I also think that your relationships with Freddie and I never really were."

"And they never will be," I added, nearly feeling the wave of pain that I knew was flowing through Carly. "And you won't find anyone until you stop playing everyone around you." With that, I got up from my seat next to Jake. "I'm sorry, man," I said, placing my hand on his shoulder before turning to leave.

"No, Freddie," I heard Jake say as I began to walk away. "Carly is the one who should be sorry, because she's the one who will be paying tonight."

I smiled grimly as I returned to the table where Sam sat, and said to her, "Looks like everything's been taken care of."

"It also looks like Carly's going to have a little less cash, too," Sam added, gesturing toward the table where Carly now sat alone. "You think we should help her out? It'll still be about ten minutes or so before our food gets here."

"We probably should," I sighed, once again rising from my seat. "We _are_ still her friends, no matter what happens."

"You're too nice, Freddie."

"Yeah, I know."

_So I didn't exactly ditch her, but what was I going to do? I wanted to help her, because I didn't want to lose a friendship I'd had for so long. You might think I was just giving into another demand, but I just see what I did as doing the right thing. Any time I can help, I guess I just do. But I guess that's how things go, right? I am now going out with Sam, who I love more than anything, I'm still friends with Carly and I made a new friend in Jake. At least for right now, everything's perfect._

* * *

So Freddie breaks up with Calry and immediately hooks up with Sam, whom he now knows that he's actually loved for his entire life, and he even gets to keep Carly as a friend for an added bonus. That's all for this chapter, hope you guys enjoyed it.


	4. My Immortal

My problem at home with the internet crashing has given me time to create another case of the rare double-update. You guys are really going to hate me for this one, but I hope you like it anyway. It was really depressing to write, but I'm sure you guys realize that things like this do happen.

* * *

My Immortal

_"I am so sorry," he had whispered to me, his gentle brown eyes losing their lively glow as he lay there, gazing up at me, his final hope, the only difference left between his life and death. _

_"About what?" I had asked him, unable to hold back the tears that had been forming, threatening to fall from the moment that uncontrolled car flew off the road, directly into the same sweet boy I was now leaning over as he clung desperately to what life was left in him. "There's nothing to be sorry for. The ambulance is on the way, and you'll be okay soon. Just hold on, I know that you'll make it through this!"_

_He looked up at me, all traces of his innocent optimism lost in the confining grasp of impending death. "You know as well as I do that what you said to me is a lie," he said, his voice nothing more than a fading murmur. His fingers lightly brushed over my hand, triggering the painful feeling of regret deep inside of me._

_"It should be me lying there, not you," I said, taking his hand into my own and bringing it up to my face. "If I would have come out of the store first, this wouldn't have happened to you…"_

_"No…it's not your fault…" he whispered, his voice strong even in his dying moments, as though he welcomed the death that was overcoming his entire being. "Please don't blame yourself, not now…"_

_I placed the hand that was not holding his against his cheek, gently resting it there, careful not to put any pressure on him. "If that's what you want," I said softly, stroking his cheek a bit with my fingertips. A slight smile formed on his lips as I did so, which told me I should continue. "You are so strong," I told him as I continued to stroke his cheek. "If you were anyone else…" I paused, not wanting to mention the fatality of the accident to the boy. As much as I didn't want to believe it, he was as good as gone already, and I wanted to make his last moments as enjoyable as possible, which was so difficult considering the pain he must have been in. _

_"I'm so sorry, Sam," he whispered again out of nowhere, weakly taking his hand from mine and resting it on the one against his cheek. "So very sorry…"_

_"Sorry for what?" I asked him softly, not allowing myself to lose my patience with him. _

_"Sorry for never telling you the truth… That I love you…" _

_With that said, Freddie Benson closed his eyes and left me forever._

* * *

"Hey there, Freddie," I said as I approached my friend's headstone. The wonderful white marble gleamed mysteriously, yet beautifully in the setting sun, creating a suspenseful, though enjoyable setting for the evening. It was a beautiful stone, really, and I had given Mrs. Benson all the money I had been saving since I was eight years old to help her buy it for Freddie. The fair, flawless marble was what caught the eyes of most visitors to the cemetery, but my favorite part would probably have been Freddie's as well: the quote engraved below his name and dates. It read, "Quality shall always overcome quantity, for one true friend is by far superior to one thousand who could care less."

I smiled, remembering the day Freddie had told me and our other friend Carly about this quote. We had all agreed that it was true, and we'd rather have each other than a whole crowd of careless friends any day. I allowed my fingers to trace the cool marble of his headstone as I thought of his innocent face. "You have the most beautiful grave here, Freddie," I whispered, staring at the name engraved into the stone. "But this isn't anywhere near the way things were meant to be."

Tearfully, I lowered myself to the ground over the spot where he had been buried only five months before, careful not to lose contact with the ever-frozen marble that should not have been in the cemetery for a very long time. "You were only seventeen…so young. Seventeen-year-olds aren't supposed to die, especially how you did… But you were so brave, Freddie, looking up at me with courage, fighting for your life, even though you knew the battle had already been lost.

"The truth is, Freddie, I'm tired of being here without you. I feel childish with all these fears taking over me, fear of how life is going to play out without you here with me. I used to wish that you would just leave, because it seems like you're still here, even though you're gone, and it used to scare me, and even though it doesn't anymore, it still refuses to leave me alone. But there's nothing I can do, and the emotional wounds caused by your unintentional leaving will never be able to heal, because this pain is real, true, something that time can never erase from my soul."

I lay my face against the earth, allowing the tears to fall just as I had five months before as I watched Freddie die, just as the ambulance pulled around the corner, about to save his life. I cried, trying to let the tears that I had held back since the horrible moment heal my broken heart, but nothing seemed to help, not even being with him at his grave.

"Do you remember how we used to be when we were younger?" I asked through my tears. "How we always used to fight all the time? I'm glad we stopped that when we turned fourteen, or I never would have gotten to know you… How about when you found out that your dad had died, how I was there with you, drying your tears, helping you fight away the fear it brought? I wish you'd be here to help me with that now…

"But nevertheless, I've been here with you through all these years, Freddie, even when we were fighting. You've always been one of my best friends, and I just want you to know that you'll always have all of me…" I looked to the sky, taking note that the sun was no longer visible and it was pitch black. "I'm sorry, Freddie. I have to leave. I'll be back tomorrow, I promise."

* * *

"Sam, wake up!" A familiar voice disturbed my sleep, causing me to shoot up from my bed and gaze over at my door only to see the one person I thought I'd never see again.

In my doorway stood an extremely lively, hugely grinning Freddie Benson, looking even better than he had before all the unfortunate events that had taken place on the day he had died. "Come on, Sam, you don't need to sleep all day everyday, do you?"

I should have been confused, wondering how it could be true, but I didn't bother to think of any of that, it was Freddie! "I thought I'd never see you again!" I cried, running into his arms. But that was when I realized something was wrong. "You're not Freddie," I said, pulling away from whoever was intruding into my home. "Freddie's been dead for nearly a half a year."

The apparition smirked, twisting Freddie's perfect face into an evil snarl of a smile. "You didn't even try to save me, did you Sam?" he growled, sending pure unadulterated fear shooting through my entire body. "You did nothing but watch me die, when the least you could have done was move me anywhere but there!"

"I didn't mean to let you die, Freddie!" I cried, backing away. I tripped, falling to the floor in front of Freddie, which only caused the falling tears to multiply to include embarrassment. "I called an ambulance and I tried to make you as comfortable as possible! I did everything I could…"

"Well everything wasn't enough, was it?" he asked darkly. As he stepped closer to me, a deadly looking dagger appeared in his hand.

I lay there on the floor, helpless to the advancing spirit, unable to move, frozen in time. "I'm sorry, Freddie," I murmured, closing my eyes so that I could not see what had become of the boy I loved. Just as my eyes had shut, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, caused by the knife that had appeared in his hand only moments before, which immediately brought my eyes back open.

"You deserved it," Freddie said, darkly glaring down at my defenseless body. "In fact, I think you deserve to–"

"Leave her alone." The new voice sounded similar to the one above me, only pure, gentle, the way it was meant to be. As this voice spoke, the apparition in front of me vanished, revealing another more innocent looking spirit standing in my doorway. "I'm sorry you had to get hurt," said the real Freddie, approaching my dying body and taking me into his arms. "But I'm sure you know that wasn't me."

I nodded, burying my face into his chest. "I've missed you so much," I said softly, letting myself cry again. "I visit you in the cemetery every day after supper and stay until after dark."

"I know," Freddie said gently, stroking my hair as I cried into his chest. "But you should go back to sleep now. When you wake up in the morning, everything will be okay."

I obediently allowed Freddie to lay me in my bed and cover me up. "Will I ever see you again?" I asked him quietly. "Or is this the last time?"

"We will meet again," he whispered, placing a finger to my lips, indicating that I should not speak again. "Good night, Sam. I love you." He softly kissed my lips once, and then, everything disappeared.

* * *

_I never did wake from the horrible nightmare that turned into my most wonderful dream, but it doesn't matter to me anymore. As long as I'm able to be with Freddie, that's all that truly matters to us now. We miss our lives every day, and wish more than anything that we could go back to them, but God had decided that it was our time to go, and we were willing to obey. I still wish that Freddie's life hadn't ended the way it had, and I hate that my life ended by stress and depression, but nothing can be done anymore. We're home now, together for eternity, and when it comes right down to it, that's all we wanted in the first place._

_Even though we never thought it would end this way. _

* * *

Sam's stress had proven to be the end of her, because it's a terrible feeling when you just discover you are in love with someone on the day they die. And to clarify, the events in her dream about the evil spirit did not occur. These events were merely her body letting her know while still dreaming that she was dying. the part where Freddie's spirit came for her, however, did actually happen. Freddie was sent by God to help Sam find her way to Heaven, even though Freddie wanted Sam to live on.

I'm sorry it had to be like this guys, because I hate killing characters that I love, but it had to end this way. I hope you liked it, though.


	5. Tourniquet

Although Tourniquet is track six on the CD, I've decided to make it the fifth chapter just because I feel like it... Haunted will probably be the next one, but you never know...

Anyway, this one looks like it's just somebody talking to themself at the beginning, but there actually is some dialogue and stuff in it a little later on, so keep reading even if you don't think you'll ever see any action!

Plain text - Here/now

_Italics - Different dimension (you'll figure it out)_

* * *

Tourniquet

Have you ever felt like you needed to escape your life, like you just needed to escape it all? I have. I actually tried to kill the pain not knowing how much more it would bring in the end. Now as I lay here dying and there's no one to save me, I pour the crimson form of regret and my own self-betrayal. I can't believe that I did this to myself, and that I'm stuck here alone, dying, praying for forgiveness of the Lord, bleeding this horrible blood of regret, and screaming for no one to hear. But surely I'm too lost to be saved, too far gone. God will no longer forgive me for this final selfish act and give me deliverance, and no one will find me…

Though I pray to my God, my _tourniquet_, to return to me salvation, for I know that every sinner has the chance to be absolved. No one deserves what I'm going through, at least, not the ones that don't bring it upon themselves. I now realize that all this pain creating a throbbing current through my entire being has been caused by my own selfishness, so why can my epiphany not save me?

Does God remember me? It seems not, for I have been lost for such a long time, _I_ can hardly even remember the innocent child I once was, the only boy that _everyone_ though of as a "good guy." But they've all lost sight of that boy, so why not the only thing that's been keeping me tied to my past? Will He be on the other side of life, or will He forget me and send me to the Hell below? I have so many questions as I lay here, praying for life to go on, and I fear that no answers will ever come. I've been gone far too long…

I pray for my soul to rest in peace; I was once a good person, someone that everyone wanted to be around all the time. I need to see what they call Heaven, the final resting place of the soul, the only place where we can all truly be set free. Will I make it through the golden gates of this beautiful afterlife, or will I fall into the fiery abyss of the dark side of life after death? I must be forgiven; I must be returned to salvation.

My wounds scream with such ferocity and aching intensity for death to come, and my soul cries for deliverance, though I don't think I have the purity left to make it to the one place where I thought I'd belong. But I can't possibly be denied… not with my entire life up until this sixteenth year dedicated to the Lord. I know my mistake… I know what I did wrong… But will I be denied because of my suicide…?

* * *

_I looked around me, knowing that this place was somewhere I had never been before, but somewhere that was still so familiar. I felt in my heart that I had seen this place before, but my mind told me otherwise. As I took in the surroundings, a man dressed all in white and surrounded by an aura of pure light approached from not too far off._

_"Freddie," He said to me, His gentle voice sending an endless calm through my body and soul. "Do you know why you are here, Freddie?"_

_I shook my head, very confused. "No… I don't. How can I possibly be here after what I did to my friends, my family? I don't understand how I can still be standing here in Your presence after everything I've done in the last year, especially my final mistake."_

_"You must realize that even though you have committed such a selfish deed that now is not your time. You knew after the fact that what you did was wrong, and you asked me for my forgiveness. I could not possibly turn away someone as true to his faith as you, Freddie, and therefore, I am giving you the second chance that is not often awarded."_

_I stared at Him, dumbfounded by what He had just told me. "You can't do that for me! I… I don't deserve a second chance."_

_"But you do, Freddie, and you know that I am the one to judge that." He smiled softly at me. "Just promise me that this time you won't taint your life with the offerings of Satan, and you will apologize to everyone whose lives you've sourly meddled in."_

_"I promise…" _

_With those words, I drifted back into sleep, a sleep that seemed endless, yet somehow very forgiving._

* * *

"He's waking up!" That voice… could it possibly be that I was…?

I slowly opened my eyes to reveal my two best friends, Carly and Sam, standing over me with tears of joy in their eyes. "Where am I?" I whispered, surprised by the weakness of my own voice.

"You're in the hospital," Carly murmured, reaching down to stroke my hair. "You've been out for about a week."

"A week? I've been in here sleeping for a whole week?"

Sam nodded and said, "You showed signs of waking up, but you never really did. Your eyes fluttered just a bit and things of that nature, but you never really woke up until just now."

"How did I get here, though?" I asked, confused at how I could have made it through all the torture I had brought upon myself. "I was alone… how did you find me?"

Carly and Sam smiled softly. "It wasn't us that found you," Carly explained. "It was some man dressed in tattered clothes, like he'd been wearing the same ones for some time. We still don't know who that man is, but somehow he seems to know who we are;' he ran into us on his way here, and it seemed like he was planning to…"

A wave of realization hit me as soon as Carly had finished speaking. "You might think I'm crazy," I said to the girls, "but I just might know who this guy is."

Now it was their turn to be confused. "How could you possibly know who it was?" Sam asked, clearly thinking that I was still in a daze from whatever drugs the hospital had me on to keep me alive. "You were unconscious when he brought you to us."

"Don't you think it's kind of weird that some hobo would know to bring me to you guys?" I asked, hoping that they would catch on. "Can't you see the possibility of divine intervention? I should be dead right now, but I'm here with you. Do you see God anywhere in this equation?"

Carly and Sam's eyes widened as I spoke, and though I could still see some doubt in Sam's eyes, I knew that she too believed what I had just said. "You're probably right," Sam whispered, probably embarrassed from admitting that I was right for once.

"Even though I didn't deserve it, here I am with a second chance. This time, I'm going to make things right, and I won't do anything stupid like that again," I told them.

"How are you so sure you won't go getting yourself into trouble again?" Carly asked, the slightest trace of fear in her eyes.

"I've got a promise to keep."

* * *

There you guys go. I hope you liked it. I made sure that no one died in this one, because I don't like killing them off and apparently neither do you. I'll try and update this soon, but it might not be a very long chapter. Right now it's in a letter format, but I may just change it. Like many other ideas of mine, you never know! So look forward to my next post in this story, as well as iSpencer, and possibly some one-shots for other shows.

Later!

iHNK (heart)


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